Wow, today really got away from me.
From the moment my alarm went off, it’s been a barrage of music, metaphorical thinking, running errands, arguing with the insurance company, doing homework, and brainstorming ways to make the community safer and more just.
I don’t have a lot of “juice” left for the blog tonight. This is what sweatpants and doggie snuggles are for.
I will say that I am working on a project I’m quite excited about, aimed at supporting victims of sexual assault and helping them to approach “closure,” whatever the fuck that might mean. I am still working on how to make these goals measurable and quantifiable. (One won’t get far in the business world without numbers.) It’s crazy to think that, if you have an idea and tenacity, you can pursue social change by filling out a few forms and creating either a board of directors or a membership program. I am eternally appreciative of my professor and his gentle guidance into the world of non-profit organizations, and what this means holistically in the capitalist landscape.
Most people want to make the world a better place—we just have different means of getting there. For so long, I saw capitalism as the root of many evils, and here I am, learning business vernacular and reaching for those legally ambiguous words one can hang their moral objectives on. We live in a world of hypocrisy and perceived duality, alright? Like Walt Whitman said, “I am large, I contain multitudes.” Some of these multitudes happen to cause me significant cognitive dissonance. C’est la vie.
Truth is, I’m still looking for my raison d’être, while I’m in French Mode. It’s possible—and I’d go so far as to say probable, given my track record—that the places where I find the most meaning and growth are the places I initially resist entering upon principle. I wrote off my current college as being a “stoner school” and, after years of philandering at other educational institutions, I find myself currently soaking up its unique educational model and adoring my professors.
Anyway, perhaps as things develop (considerably further down the road) I will post more on the matter. For now, I hope everyone reading this as at least flirting with their raison d’être, circling around truth and love and the pursuit of goodness and glowing that feeling outwards like a Fibonacci spiral. I hope you can feel my excitement. Goodnight, world!